My husband gave me herpes. I’m confused about what to do. One part of me thinks the only self-respecting thing to do is leave him, but the other part of me is trying to talk me into staying and trying to get past the hurt, the anger and the embarrassment. How do I decide the right thing to do?
How did your husband catch herpes? Did he always have it and not tell you? Did he always have it but he didn’t know he had it? Did he cheat while married to you and kept you in the dark until he gave you an STD? Look at the circumstances surrounding your husband’s catching herpes then passing it to you. If he cheated on you and didn’t have the decency to protect himself so he wouldn’t put you at risk that’s something you need to give serious thought. If he could do it once he can do it again, and there are more deadly diseases that he can pass to you, so you want to think about your life and your safety. It’s well and good to stay and try to get past the hurt, anger and embarrassment, but if by staying you are risking your life then the right thing to do doesn’t seem so hard to figure out.
Can you trust your husband not to go out and sleep with someone else and pick up another STD to bring home to you? If not, and if you decide to stay, then at least take steps to protect yourself because your husband clearly isn’t going to take those steps for you, assuming he got herpes as a result of cheating on you.