Many more women have had this experience than you might imagine. It’s usually devastating and more often than not there is nothing anyone can say or do to make you feel better right away. In plenty of cases the husband does come back home so if the main thing you fear is that he won’t come back you should remember that the odds are in your favor that he will. No doubt you’re in a state of panic and feeling desperate right now. If this is the first time your husband has walked out on you it’s possible you already called a friend, a sibling, a parent, and they did their best to calm you down. They told you it’s going to be okay, not to worry. Maybe some told you your husband will come back. Maybe others told you you’re better off without him anyway; but once they hung up you were back in your panic. Your pain didn’t ease. In fact with every minute that passes without the sound of a key in the door your pain and panic increases.
Maybe this is your second time or your third time and you don’t feel like you can call anyone because you know they won’t have any sympathy for you because you shouldn’t have taken him back the first time to give him another opportunity to walk out on you. So you’re trying to bear your anguish, trying to avoid flying into a full blown panic as you listen for that key in the door, hoping and praying.
It’s never easy to deal with all the emotions and the panic that takes hold of you when your husband leaves; and very often words like “everything is going to be okay” not only fail to comfort, they can also be patronizing. But the truth is, you really are going to be fine. You husband will probably come back and if he doesn’t you’ll live to thank him. Because when a husband leaves it means things aren’t great in the relationship for you either. You are married to someone who is capable of just walking out and abandoning you. That is not the action of someone who cares about you; and what’s the benefit to you to be married to someone who shows by his actions that he does not care about you? There is none.
If money is part of the reason you’re panicking you might have to be prepared to reach out to your family, church or community. If you have no job and no money you will need help getting on your feet if your husband does not come back. Even if he does come back you should seek help finding ways to take care of yourself so that in the event he leaves again you can at least know that you’re not at risk of becoming homeless.
Reach out to people. This is not a time to be alone. Even if your husband has walked out so many times you’re ashamed to go crying to anyone about it, there’s always someone you can talk to who won’t judge and will just listen and be supportive. It might not be any of your friends or family. It might be a stranger on a crisis helpline or strangers on a forum message board. There are people who understand and want to help; so don’t suffer alone.