Wife had about a year long affair with no regard to the kids, her marriage, or family. We we together for about 18 years at the time. I don’t believe in, oh we all need to get around. I have only ever asked her to be honest with me and if she wanted out then I would grant her wishes. I suspected it right from the start and then went about getting proof. It took a while but I got it and now she wants things to go back to the way they were. I know so many details about where and how things happened that it sometimes makes me sick. I fake headaches or upset stomach, will find work to do, stay up late, wait till she is super tired, just so that I don’t have to think about the both of them together when she touches me.
It has been two years and I can’t look at her without thinking of it. I hate being with her and hate that I am still married. I did make it clear to her that in my heart, I am no longer married. She also knows that if if were not for the two kids, I would have left. I can’t give my kids a good quality of life if we divorce. I love them so much and want to be around them as much as possible. I also don’t trust who she would have around them if we divorced. What a nightmare my life has become.
She does not communicate and has no reason for anything she did. Yes, we have been at marriage counselling … nothing has helped me. She claims how sorry she is. I don’t believe anything she says because of how great she managed to tell lies during the affair.
No doubt, I want out. I am a relatively young man. I have two young kids with her.
I hate my life with her. I only wanted someone that respected me like I did them. Someone that would be honest and to share the events of life with. I don’t want to do anything with her anymore.
I don’t argue and didn’t even argue when I presented the proof of the affair. My kids haven’t seen us argue about this and most likely won’t. The oldest knows something happened but she is not old enough to put it all together yet. She will eventually though and I assume she won’t look at her mother the same ever again. I won’t fuel that and will tell her to have the best relationship she can with her mother but to always be careful of what she trust with her mother. Yes, it sounds cruel but she did do her best to leave the kids with anyone she could in order to go off and have sex. She didn’t care much about their safety and put them way behind her own selfish desires.
Yeah, I am done in the relationship but don’t know how to go about leaving. It will break my daughters heart. I don’t think I can do that. Plus, I can’t afford to live on my own and support the kids. I just wish I could find a great woman but I am sure they are a myth.
I hear how much women bash the men out there. I would have been so much better off if I would have treated women like 2nd hand goods and tossed it aside. Yes, I loved my wife but now with what she has done, I can’t stand to be with her. No magic left … there is nothing.