Kyle Richards Mauricio Umanksy – why some people want it to turn out that Mauricio cheats on Kyle and how that affects you
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Kyle Richards Mauricio Umanksy – why some people want it to turn out that Mauricio cheats on Kyle and how that affects you

If you have no idea who they are my hats off to you. I’m not proud that I’ve seen several episodes of the Bravo TV show The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, but because I write on a marriage website I thought it might be useful to check out the show for material to blog about. So I’ve seen a few episodes and read some other blogs and I’ve noticed that Kyle Richards, the aunt of Paris Hilton, is the most popular housewife. Kyle, 42 years old, is married to a good looking, athletic man who recently turned 40. The two appear to have a very good marriage. I’m not sure how long they’ve been married. They have 3 children together I think. What has stood out to me are scenes between Kyle Richards and her fellow Real Housewife of Beverly Hills co-star Taylor Armstrong in which Taylor has complained to Kyle about her marriage. I wrote about it in Lessons to learn from the marriage of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Taylor Armstrong and her husband Russell Armstrong.

Someone left a comment that I think is right on target as far as what I myself noticed in one of the episodes where Taylor was complaining to Kyle about her marriage. Kyle’s responses are not very helpful. They border on boastful about her perfect marriage, but she boasts in a very subtle way. So when I come across comments or notice from researching that people are curious to almost wishful that Kyle’s husband Mauricio Umansky is cheating on her, I can understand, though I do not agree they should, why some people would want to laugh at Kyle if it turned out that Mauricio is cheating or has cheated on her.

I’ve written on this subject before, about how it ‘s hard to be happy for couples who flaunt their relationship, especially when you are in a difficult relationship.  I don’t know Kyle Richards so I can’t make accusations against her that she flaunts her relationship and works to make her marriage appear on the outside more perfect than it might be in reality. It could be that in reality her marriage is perfect and if so then that is good for everyone because it tells us that happy marriages are possible; but to me, Kyles motivation in her responses to Taylor aren’t to be helpful in encouraging Taylor to believe in her marriage and in her relationship with her husband and to work to achieve the closeness she craves. She basically simply agrees with Taylor’s comments about how close she (Kyle) and her husband (Mauricio) are and how they seem so happy together and so connected. How is that supposed to help Taylor feel better about her own situation? And that is why I think some people would be glad if Kyle fell off her high horse. She comes off like the type who would go to any length to preserve the image of perfection she presents as far as being the perfect wife and mother, having the perfect husband and the perfect life. When your life is perfect you’re not supposed to gloat about it and show off about it, especially not in the face of someone who is crying about how imperfect her own life is. It makes those people able to see through your sympathetic smiles and your reaching across to dry the tear on your friends face and holding her hand in a show of support while telling her to forget about her loser husband right after you’ve praised your own husband for being your best friend, dislike you and wish you ill.

So how does all this affect you?

Well, if you’re in a bad marriage for example, there is something to be said for not speaking poorly about your spouse to other people, whether you do it directly or indirectly. Taylor Armstrong never actually said her husband was a cold, unfeeling, douchebag, but by complimenting Kyle Richard’s husband while complaining about the kind of relationship she wishes she had with her husband, she basically states that her husband is the opposite of the good qualities she detects in Mauricio Umansky. She is putting down her husband to her so-called friend. And the so-called friend does what? She basically says what amounts to an agreement with Taylor that Taylor’s marriage sucks and her husband really isn’t interested in her at all and is not her friend.

Depending on the role you play, whether you’re the complainer or the one with the perfect marriage your friend expresses envy over, there are more productive ways of handling either situation. If you’re the complainer, reconsider how you speak about your marriage to others. It’s okay to cry on a friend’s shoulder but be sure you’re crying to a friend who respects your marriage otherwise if it’s help fixing your marriage you’re seeking you’re not going to get it there.

As for being in the role of the happily married friend whose shoulder is cried upon, what someone who is supposedly happily married and wants others to be as happily married should do in that situation is admit that it takes work to achieve the kind of harmony and closeness they have with their spouse. Uplift the spirits of the person in need with encouraging words. Speak in general about the fact that marriage isn’t always easy, but if two people are willing to work at it they can learn how to be closer and they can grow in friendship with each other and their marriage can thrive. Unless they are married to a complete and total loser (and who is to be the judge of what constitutes a complete and total loser?), point out good qualities their spouse possesses, or try to offer helpful ideas for why their spouse might act a certain way.

In the case of Russell Armstrong for example, the main discussion centered around his lack of attention to his wife and how he doesn’t ever seem to want to be at the events they attend, how he’s always off alone in a corner somewhere and never seems to enjoy himself. Well, maybe he’s not comfortable in social situations. It happens, and the episodes I’ve seen in which he has had to socialize he looks uncomfortable in his own skin. Maybe he has social issues. Maybe he doesn’t like having the whole world looking in on his private life. Maybe, as someone put it, he’s socially awkward. Some people are socially inept. It doesn’t make Russell Armstrong a freak if he’s unable to act natural and normal with cameras in his face and the knowledge that the world is going to be watching him on reality TV. It’s on his wife to care enough to be aware of him, be aware of where he’s at mentally and emotionally, know what’s going on with him and why he isn’t reacting the way she wants him to react. Talk to him. Look inward, not outward. Maybe it might be easier for her to make an adjustment than for him. Who knows? But complaining about him for all the world to hear, comparing him unfavorably to other women’s husbands, these actions will not create the marriage she supposedly wants.

Finally, just because the grass looks greener doesn’t mean it is. Don’t long for a marriage that’s like this friend’s or that friend’s marriage. You only know about their marriage what they want you to know and it empowers them to have you expressing your wish to have a marriage like theirs. Do take a lesson from them though. Unless you know you’re talking to a friend who loves you and wants the best for you and has respect for your marriage and the person you’re married to, keep your business to yourself. Discussing your marital problems with people who think poorly of your spouse is as bad an idea as it is to go around flaunting your perfect marriage in the faces of your unhappily married friends.

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0 22 22960 24 January, 2011 Marriage Watch January 24, 2011

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  1. rachel

    Mauricio and Kyle are the real deal. Their relationship is what it appears. They’ve been married since 1996. What couple you know married 14 years can do such a good job pretending to be in love and happy together?

    1. Jacklyn Luntaon

      Mauricio Umansky married Kyle Richards because she was pregnant. They married in Jan 1996, their daughter (alexia Umansky) was born in June of 1996. Kyle was almost 4 months pregnant when she & Mauricio wed. All’s well that ends well now with their marriage but it always wasn’t that way. …

    2. Emily

      Those who know Mauricio know he is not a Perfect husband. He hit on my single girlfriend at a party when Kyle turned her back. It was so disrespectful to Kyle, I was in shock. Everyone knows that whatever people try to project the most is what they are not. There is no perfect marriage everyone has issues. Kyle tries so hard to pretend she has a perfect husband when if fact I have heard what he says to other girls. She needs to vent her anger at her husband, if he truely cared he would not do these things. Michele’s comment below on Nov 22 2011, hits the nail on the head. She mentions how Mauricio let the woman hang all over him in his own home at the white party. He let his wife deal with the woman, without shutting her down himself. The blog she mentions also says this

      “Ultimately, one has to wonder why Mauricio was not more protective of his marriage himself. When Kyle tells the camera, “This is my family and I don’t need predators in my home,” she blames only the woman as if hunky Mauricio is a defenseless lamb. Yet the successful realtor Mauricio has proven he is articulate and clever. He could have excused himself to refill the punch bowl or found some less dramatic way to spare his wife the embarrassment of defending her marriage in front of her closest friends and relatives.”

    3. Emily

      Mauricio is very disrespectful to Kyle, he hits on other girls when she is not around. I have seen and heard it, and others in Beverly Hills will tell you he has a reputation for fooling around on her. probably why she is so insecure.

  2. rachel

    People are just jealous, including you who wrote this. Jealousy is ugly. And you won’t have the satisfaction to laugh at Kyle because Mauricio loves his wife so why would he cheat on her?

  3. rachel

    Kyle doesn’t try to act like her marriage is perfect. And why shouldn’t she be proud of her marriage and speak positively about her marriage and her husband? All wives should do that. It’s not Kyle’s fault if Taylor isn’t proud of her own marriage and has no respect for her own husband.

  4. rachel

    Kyle is genuine. She speaks what’s on her mind and doesn’t try to be all fake and diplomatic. She called it like she saw it with Russell. It’s obvious he doesn’t love Taylor. A real friend wouldn’t try to convince her to work at a marriage with a man that obviously doesn’t love her and to settle for unhappiness for the rest of her life.

  5. SashaiG

    I agree. When I give relationship advice I try to give pointers to friends without making it a ME show and I have a very healthy and loving relationship. I don’t have to bring it up when givin advice because my friends already see that which is why they seek my advice in the first place. Clearly Mauricio isn’t Mr. Perfect because inthe lost footage some woman is all over Mauricio and he didn’t seem to have a problem with it, and Kyle had to come over and tell her to get off of her husband. A good husband would have handled that himself. That woman would have been over him if Kyle were not there and that is not a good sign. Hypothetically speaking, if my husband ever allowed some woman to behave like that with him without telling her she is bein inappropriate, I would be gone before he could even blink. Anyway, I digress.

  6. SashaiG

    That wasnt Taylor. It really doesnt matter who the woman was, Mauricio should have handled that without his wife having to come over and say “get off my husband”, I would have been embarrassed if my husband allowed another woman to be all over him. She should be embarrassed that she had to come over to “correct” the woman. He should have been accountable for that and not left it up to his wife. What if Kyle hadn’t been there? He would have said nothing to that woman. It would actually be worse if it was Taylor that he allowed to be all over him, although it wasn’t her in the commercial.

  7. Victoria

    I think Kyle should be able to talk freely about how happy she is in her marriage and if you have a problem with that, then you’re just looking to deeply and trying to imagine that it just can’t be good. It’s obviously a good relationship if both of them are so open and honest about it. The only people that would hope that there’s some dirt to their marriage are people who most likely have been burnt themselves. But let me just say that there is such thing as a beautiful healthy relationship and if you don’t believe that, then your just a negative person who has never been happy themselves. Kyle can brag all she wants. Now, if either of them end of cheating then that’s that, but for now, it’s all good so just leave it how it is and get over it.

  8. Victoria

    Basically, Kyle & Mauricio are married and a couple so if you try to imagine anything different then you are just a hater who belives that nothing is possible. Try fact is, “Anything is Possible”. So there’s no reason to hate on a couple who got it going on!

    1. Victoria

      “TRUE FACT” (typo) Of course anything NICE is possible so there’s no reason to hate on a couple who clearly got it going on, in a good way! Just being real!

  9. pwi

    how can you be sure about what kyle actually said to taylor if you just so a few minutes of the conversation, especially edited for the show?

  10. Horatio

    I agree that it is good for women to say positive things about their spouses and their relationships. Not to rub it in others faces which is a fine line though. But it should be more popular to be happy for your friends when they say they are doing well and it should be more acceptable to hear good news. Now a days no one wants to hear “my significant other hmm..what do i have to say about him? He is a hard worker, loving, etc” everyone wants to hear the negative stuff, the juicy stuff. Lets just turn to shows like the real housewives for this. I do believe though that kyle may cross the line a bit into flaunting her perfect marriage and acting like she is always right. Rather than bragging it would have been more tasteful to say to Taylor “listen noone has the perfect relationship. There will always be struggles but you have to decide if the struggle is outweighing the positive happy things” something like that. At least admit you and mauricio have had some bumps along the road kyle, sheesh!

  11. Michelle

    This blog does a great job at dissecting the disturbing scene with Mauricio dancing with a woman at Kyle’s white party.

    Please check it out. The writer brings up very valid points that raise the question about whether Kyle’s marriage is a case of “the grass isn’t always greener on the other side.” First of all, no marriage is absolutely perfect, simply for the fact that no person is perfect. Marriages are beautiful, because they are the representation of two people, loving each other so much that their love overcompensates for the flaws each partner brings to the table. But, this scene from Kyle’s white party reveals something quite troubling about her marriage. Mauricio very well could have stopped the woman by finding a way to slip away, rather than standing there and waiting for his wife to step in aggressively for him like he were a defenseless mule. So maybe if Kyle wasn’t present, he might have danced with the other woman well into the night and might have even done more. Kyle’s aggressiveness reveals more than a momma grizzly protecting her vulnerable husband. It represents insecurity, because if my man was ambushed by a women, as Mauricio was, I would know that he would have the situation in check, because he would. He certainly wouldn’t remain in the situation, smiling strangely and still allowing another woman to drape her arms around his shoulders. To stand by and allow his woman to step in for him not only shows that his manhood is not only skin deep, but it implies that he is a push over, who has absolutely no respect for his wife, even to the point of humiliating her in front of all her friends. What would he do if her back were turned?

  12. Barb Cole

    All we know is that Kyle was pregnant when she married her first husband, and pregnant when she married Mauricio. Good role model.. Oh well, What is NOT apparent, is where or how she MET Mauricio. I would like to know where or how they met.

  13. Sharon

    I hope it’s true about Mauricio. Kyle deserves it. I’m tired of her always needing to be the center of attention. I can’t stand looking at her with her underbite and always smacking her lips together. No wonder her husband cheats on her. She and her ditzy alcoholic sister need to leave the show. Good riddance to both of them.

  14. Dianne

    Omg yes the underbite! I thought I was the only one who noticed! And the lips smacking together constantly! Ugh I cannot stand to watch her I don’t see how her husband even stuck around this long!!


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