How should I handle this…
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How should I handle this…

Guest wrote: My wife travels for work and her and her colleagues go out almost every night and I’ve told her to always be careful and of course she says she will be and I don’t need to worry. Well she came clean that she got WAY to drunk and overly flirted with a man who eventually made his move on her but she shot him down. She didn’t leave though she stayed out with her colleagues (and the guy) until the bar closed. What upsets me the most is that what I always worried about came true, secondly her colleagues didn’t try and stop her from flirting. How should I handle this?

Editor’s Response

It doesn’t really sound as if there’s very much you can do. Nothing happened, assuming your wife is telling the truth. So technically there’s nothing that needs to be handled. You have already spoken to your wife and asked her to be careful when she goes out partying. The rest is up to her. She is an adult. She’s 100% responsible for the choices that she makes. And if she’s determined to make bad choices she’s going to make them no matter what you say or do.

You can keep reminding her to be careful. That’s about the only thing you can do. Keep communicating your concerns. But accept that as long as you’re not physically there with your wife to protect her from herself, you’re powerless to do anything to prevent the things you worry might happen from happening.

Your wife’s colleagues cannot be expected to look out for your wife or to look out for your marriage. Your wife should be looking out for herself and looking out for your marriage. If she isn’t doing that, the reason behind her careless behavior might be the thing that needs handling.

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0 1 347 18 April, 2015 Liars & Cheats April 18, 2015

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