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I’m the nagging wife…
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I’m the nagging wife…

Writing this because I need an outlet…. My husband says all I do is complain and bitch at him and I’m always negative. I’ve never seen myself this way, and I sit and think about it, and I just don’t know what to do. I’m sad. Really sad. I don’t think I bitch a lot, I don’t think I complain. I mostly complain because he’s flirty with other women, and it bothers me. Not because I don’t trust him, because I do. I bring it up in the nicest way possible, the nicest way that I know how because I’m just afraid to be embarrassed by another woman asking him isn’t he in a relationship in front of everyone. I look dumb. I rub his back every night. I do what he asks of me. If he needs something I try my best to get it done, whether it’s getting him an address, calling a company for him, washing his uniform, anything. I try. I try not to bitch or complain and I think I do an amazing job. I don’t find myself bitching at him. I may rub his back, may do what he asks but somehow he is always in a bad mood or upset. The other day he asked me to let me him know when I was done on the iPad. I mimicked his voice as a joke just to lighten the mood. He stormed out of the living room and left the house. I don’t understand how I make him so upset. It’s just come down to me loving him and just wanting him to be happy. With me or not. And I’ve let him know. And when I do, he hugs me and tells me he doesn’t want to lose me. I just don’t understand. He says he doesn’t want to hear me talk like that. But then he has this awful negative view on me. I’ve never felt so bad about myself like this before. Like how can I make someone so unhappy? I’m 9 weeks pregnant for the first time. My first pregnancy, and it’s just awful. I just want to be happy. I want to feel special and make someone else happy. I know how, I just don’t understand why it can’t be him.

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0 1 422 24 July, 2015 Marriage Life July 24, 2015

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1 comment

  1. Marie

    Well first of all ,its great that you think about your behavior and want to be happy. But maybe thinking isnt the answer. You need to listen. Mimicing his voice about the ipad to lighten the mood was very disrespectful. Seriously.WHen does teaseing in a disrespectful way ever lighten the mood? There was a time in my marriage where I couldnt say anything right. My husband felt so disrected by my comments and the way I spoke to him that he was always on edge and yes he flirted to get some admireing attention from other woman cause he saw me as a complainer and it made him feel small. One morning I woke up with the idea not to speak, only saying yes or no sweety with a smile. I had to literally put duct tape on my mouth when he was around. He was extremely touched by my intense desire to change the way I spoke to him. Men NEED respect and admiration. Their self worth thrives on it . Just like us woman NEED love and tenderness to feel good in a relationship. My marriage didnt get better overnight but we have both grown and matured from this experience and I now recognize whats disrespectful and apologize when I have acted that way. He treats me sooo good now. Lately we have spiced up the bedroom with some role playing and its hilarious fun. He says Im more fun to be around and gets excited to see me because he knows Im happy and not going to complain or bitch at him. He said he feels loved by me. I had to get over my insecurities and fear of showing love to him. I think deep down I bitched because I wanted to make him feel as miserable as I felt. No more. I do what makes me happy now so I enjoy my life and anything I do for him comes from my heart not cause Im insecurely trying to please him. Good Luck sweety. BTW Im 47 yrs old and been married 20 years. Marie

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