My husband and I have been married for 2 years, together a total of 6. I have an 8-year-old child from a previous relationship.

In person, my husband is the best husband ever. He is caring, sweet, respectful, never loses his temper, and does so much for our family. We rarely fight and I’ve always felt like our marriage is strong and happy and healthy. The problem is, he goes to my mom and talks bad about me and my child. Complaining about our financial problems, how I need to get a 2nd job (I already work 40 hours a week), how I’m always nagging him to do the dishes, etc. Then he complains that my child misbehaves, struggles in school, and acts like a brat because I don’t discipline him enough (he is low-functioning autistic, btw).

My biggest issue with this is, my mom severely abused me and my siblings for years. We were removed from her by CPS in middle school and reunited after adulthood. She insists that she was a great mom and didn’t do anything wrong. Because of this, there is a huge strain on our relationship and I don’t trust her at all. I’m very distant from her and don’t confide her in anything, whatsoever. We only see each other for family events and holiday’s.

She has been using whatever my husband says against me, saying that I’m a horrible wife and a failure of a mother. She has gone to other family members and spread nasty rumors about me. I’ve confronted my husband about this and he just ignores it, act like it isn’t a big deal, and then does it again later on.

What should I do?