You can still save your marriage
Before you throw in the towel on your marriage you should consider marriage counseling. Sometimes all a couple needs is a third party to guide them and help them get to understand themselves and each other better and be able to work together towards building a stronger relationship and a better marriage.
Search Powered by Google
To find a marriage counselor near you enter the specifics of what you’re looking for. For example if you reside in Los Angeles California and you’re looking for a marriage counselor near you, enter “Los Angeles California marriage counselors”.
Not all relationships are worth saving…
It’s important for you to honestly assess your relationship with your spouse. Sometimes we marry the wrong person. And it makes no difference what we do, we cannot fix our marriage for the simple reason that we and our spouse do not belong together. Some people will tell you differently. And they often make a good argument that there is no right person and wrong person.
It’s true to say that any two reasonable and rational people can get along if they both really want to. We are intelligent beings after all. But sometimes we just don’t like a person. Their ‘way’ and our way clashes. And the only chance for harmony requires one person to change. But neither individual is willing to change. And why should either have to change? Sometimes the marriage just isn’t worth the trouble that must be undertaken to fix it. And it’s important to be honest with yourself and figure out if it’s really in your and your spouse’s best interest to prolong your misery hoping to fix something that simply cannot be fixed.
If you are certain that you love your spouse and want to save your marriage, and if you are certain that your spouse is willing to work hard with you to try to save your marriage, then by all means do everything you can to save your marriage.
IS YOUR MARRIAGE CRUSHING YOU LIKE A GRAPE?
Have you ever been to a winery?
Hi. My name is Mort Fertel, author of Marriage Fitness.
Can you imagine what it would be like to be one of those grapes? Really…play along with me here for a moment.
Can you imagine what it would be like to be plucked, pushed, crushed, pressed, skinned, and fermented? OUCH! The pain! What’s the point of it all?
A lot of people feel that way about the pain they experience in their marriage. “Why am I doing this? Where is this relationship going?”
But just as a grape goes through a difficult process before it becomes a fine wine, sometimes our marriage has to go through a painful process before it matures.
The people who have the best marriages are NOT people who grew up well-adjusted, have healthy adult lives, and normal parents. People like that usually have OKAY marriages.
The BEST marriages are with couples who were crushed, who went through a painful process, and who built their relationship from the ruins of broken hearts.
There’s an ancient song by King David, “Those who sow in tears will reap harvest in glad song.”
And so it is that pain is often the preview to pleasure. Any woman who has experienced child birth can testify to this truth.
In my work doing marriage coaching, I have noticed that very often the turning point in a marriage is when a couple hits rock bottom. It’s not until they’ve been through the worst that things start to get better.
But the turnaround in a marriage is NOT automatic. Just because you hit bottom, does NOT mean you’ll bounce back. If you don’t make it happen, you’ll just crash. In order to turn your marriage around, you have to take RESPONSIBILITY.
What does it REALLY mean to be responsible? A person who is responsible has the ABILITY to RESPOND. In other words, if you take response-ability for your marriage, then your marriage is not determined solely by what happens; it’s also determined by how you RESPOND to what happens.
A responsible person is not a victim to their circumstances. They are the master of their fate. How you respond to your marital circumstances today WILL determine your marital circumstances tomorrow. YOUR actions create your marriage. You can turn sour grapes into a fine wine.
If you know how to do this, then do it now. If you need help, then USE ME. I can help you. Years ago my marriage was hours from “done.” I turned it around and I can show you how too. I’ve helped thousands of marriages. Have you seen the miracle stories on my web site?
Making a relationship work is not mystical. Love is NOT a mystery. You don’t have to be “lucky in love.” You can “make love.” You just have to know the recipe.
If you want to learn more about how I can help you, subscribe to my FREE report, “7 Secrets for a Stronger Marriage” and get my FREE marriage assessment. CLICK HERE to subscribe. It’s FREE.
Author of Marriage Fitness
Suffering in life is inevitable but…
Suffering at the hands of someone you’ve only known for a few years who isn’t connected to you by any biological means is not one of those unavoidable realities that must be endured for lack of a choice.
You have choices. You did not get married so you could be in misery and pain every day of your life. You did not get married so you could be even more lonely and feel even more alone than you did before you got married.
Occasional conflict is normal. Constant discord between you and your spouse should never be accepted and endured as the reality of marriage.